Changes - Large and Small

Funny how life changes not just from year to year, but the smaller changes that happen on a day to day or even minute by minute basis. My whole life I've written stories of one sort or another - mostly sci-fi with a horror twist. But, I've also written stories with certain themes or beliefs within them. I always felt that my family both immediate and extended humored me by telling me that (what ever I had given them to read) it was a nice story. With that type of response (real or my perception) I had very little confidence in my ability to actually write well.

For the last twelve years I've been a member of the Speculative Fiction Writer's Cooperative (formerly the Sci-fi Writer's Cooperative) and not only have I gotten a better grasp on the mechanics of writing, I have gained more self-confidence in my writing. While I know that I still have a lot to learn in the craft, I no longer feel like someone who is being humored by the people who love me. There are actually people in the group who (while they may not like my subject matter - yes, you Chuck) they believe in me and the fact that I can tell a story well. Gives a person reasons to keep writing - well that and the fact that I still have characters showing up in my head wanting their story told. As long as they keep coming, I'll keep writing them down. I'll also always keep writing in my journal - which I've kept since I turned eight.

Changes on a smaller scale that have occurred in the past few months; our daughter, Katie is now engaged to a very nice man (Ryan). Our son, Kenny moved out last fall and my husband, Bill is now retired. All this change has left me feeling somewhat adrift and not sure where life will be going. But, all the upheaval and change is recorded in my journals for no one to ever read. Well, who knows, maybe when I'm gone someone will dig them up and decide that they make good reading. All that angst, sorrow, joy, frustration and anger has to end up somewhere.

Smaller changes still come from discovering that I still have muscles - the new water aerobics teachers at the YMCA know how to make you work every muscle in your body. By the end of each week, I feel stronger and even have better balance. So, even though changes take time, some years and some come with every move, change is a good thing and something to be embraced.